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Sitting Softly: Allowing Those You Love to Take Care of You

In the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, it's easy to fall into the rhythm of being the caretaker for those we love. As a woman who shares a home with two incredible humans-my best friend and my son, I have always found immense joy in preparing meals for Bobby and Ethan. However, there came a moment when I realized the importance of allowing my family to reciprocate that care and nourishment.

Being a caretaker often means putting the needs of others before our own. We become so accustomed to giving that we forget the beauty and warmth that comes from receiving. It's a lesson I've learned over time and one that has transformed the dynamics of our family life.

For the longest time, I hesitated to express my desire to be taken care of. It's not that my family was unwilling; it's just that the role of the caretaker had become so ingrained in me that I almost felt guilty asking for the same in return. However, as life continued to unfold, I discovered the joy and magic that lies in allowing those you love to take care of you.

This Sunday, after a particularly demanding day at Tulip and Tea, our beloved retail store and tea shop in Conyers, GA, I found myself in need of some care and attention. Instead of pushing through the fatigue and taking charge in the kitchen, I decided to let Bobby and Ethan step in. Though Bobby may not be a natural cook and Ethan is still learning the ropes, I realized that the act of them preparing a meal for me was more precious than any gourmet dish.

Even though I had to guide them through the steps of creating a meal, the end result was beyond rewarding. Our home transformed into a haven of warmth and love. The ordinary Sunday evening turned into an extraordinary experience, proving that the magic lies not just in the outcome but in the process itself.

As the aroma of braised short ribs wafted through the air, I could see the joy in Bobby and Ethan's eyes. It was a shared experience, a bonding moment that wouldn't have been possible if I hadn't allowed myself to be on the receiving end of their care. The meal they prepared wasn't just about the food; it was about the effort, the intention, and the love that went into it.

This simple yet profound realization led me to understand that we have the power to turn mundane moments into unforgettable experiences by allowing ourselves to receive the special things we often reserve for others. It's about creating a balance in the give-and-take of care within our relationships.

Too often, caretakers are taken for granted. Our acts of love and service become expected, and we forget that we are human too, with needs and desires. By embracing the vulnerability of being cared for, we open up new avenues for connection and intimacy within our relationships.

So, how can we incorporate this shift into our lives? It starts with communication. I had to express my desire for reciprocation to my family openly. It's not a sign of weakness to admit that we too need care; it's a testament to our humanity. Honest conversations about our needs create understanding and strengthen the bonds of love and support within our families.

Moreover, it's about embracing imperfection. Bobby and Ethan may not have been seasoned chefs, but the effort they put into making that meal spoke volumes. Sometimes, it's the imperfect moments that become the most cherished memories. We don't have to do it all ourselves; we can let go of control and allow others to contribute in their unique ways.

Taking care of ourselves doesn't mean neglecting our responsibilities or abandoning our roles as caretakers. It's about acknowledging that we deserve the same love and attention we so willingly give. By allowing ourselves to be cared for, we not only replenish our own well-being but also create a more balanced and harmonious environment for everyone involved.

In conclusion, the simple act of sitting softly and allowing those we love to take care of us can transform ordinary moments into extraordinary memories. It's a lesson in reciprocity, vulnerability, and the profound beauty that lies in the interconnectedness of our relationships.

As I savor the flavor of those homemade braised short ribs, I am reminded that true magic happens when we open our hearts to both giving and receiving love. So, let us cherish the caretakers in our lives and, in turn, allow ourselves to be cherished. After all, the symphony of love plays most harmoniously when each instrument is given its chance to be heard.


Asha Gomez is Asha Gomez is a mom, chef, floral designer, lifestyle maven, James Beard nominated author, and the owner of Tulip & Tea, a retail store and tea shop in Conyers, GA.


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